House of Link
by PepperTehUnicorn
Summary: What if Legend of Zelda: Twilight Prince and House of Night crossed each other, when Midna messes up a warp? find out when you read!


****disclaimer****:i don't own House of night aka hon or legend of zelda : twilight princess aka loztp  
Link and stark:well sienna you could have owned it if you wrote the book(HON)and created the video game(LOZTP)

~~~~~~third person pov~~~~~~~~~~~~~~The house of night~~~~~  
zoey was walking to her third hour when a portal open and a wolf and a small person with weird markings on her body fell on top screamed and got up and turned around"w-w-what are you and who are you" the wolf turn into a human form and said"HI my name is link and this is my friend midna"gesturing to the weird girl.  
"h-hi m-m-my n-na-ame is z-zoey a-and y-y-your c-can turn i-i-into a w-wolf"zoey said /asked  
"yes"link said  
"AWESOME"zoey said doing some wierd little dance  
"......."link just stared at her like she was crazy and said"oooookkkaaaayyyy"  
after zoey got done with her dance damian came out and said"hey z which poem do y-AH WHAT ARE YOU"he said/screamed at link and midna jumping up and landng on zoey"ow"zoey whispered"ohh thanks z for breaking my fall""your so not welcome air get damian off of me"zoey said and air lifted damian off of zoey"i can breath again""Sorry" apologized damein

"ummm zoey who is this" said damien and link at the same time pointing at eachother

"This is link and this is damian"

"hi"damin said

"ummm hi"link said

while link and damian were talking midna and zoey were talking about how cute link was

"omg zoey look at his butt though its so nice firm and round"midna said

*then somewere in the back ground baby got back starts playing*

Oh my god, Becky, look at her butt  
It is so big  
She looks like one of those rap guys girlfriends  
Who understands those rap guys  
They only talk to her because she looks like a total prostitute, ok?  
I mean her butt  
It's just so big  
I can't believe it's so round  
It's just out there  
I mean, it's gross  
Look, she's just so black

"umm were is that coming from"zoey askes "who cares lets dance"midna says and starts shakin her but 'ok'zoey said

I like big butts and I can not lie  
You other brothers can't deny  
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waste  
And a round thing in your face  
You get sprung  
Wanna pull up front  
Cuz you notice that butt was stuffed  
Deep in the jeans she's wearing  
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring  
Oh, baby I wanna get with ya  
And take your picture  
My homeboys tried to warn me  
But with that butt you got  
Me so horny  
Ooh, rub all of that smooth skin  
You say you wanna get in my Benz  
Well use me, use me cuz you ain't that average groupy

I've seen them dancin'  
The hell with romancin'  
She sweat, wet, got it goin' like a turbo 'Vette

I'm tired of magazines  
saying flat butt's the only thing  
Take the average black man and ask him that  
She gotta pack much back, so...

Fellas (yeah), fellas (yeah)  
Has your girlfriend got the butt (hell yeah)  
Well shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it, shake that healthy butt  
Baby got back

(LA face with Oakland booty)

I like'em round and big  
And when I'm throwin' a gig  
I just can't help myself  
I'm actin like an animal  
Now here's my scandal

I wanna get you home  
And ugh, double ugh, ugh  
I ain't talkin' bout Playboy  
Cuz silicone parts were made for toys  
I wannem real thick and juicy  
So find that juicy double  
Mixalot's in trouble  
Beggin' for a piece of that bubble  
So I'm lookin' at rock videos  
Watchin' these bimbos walkin' like hoes  
You can have them bimbos  
I'll keep my women like Flo Jo  
A word to the thick soul sistas  
I wanna get with ya  
I won't cus or hit ya  
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna fuck  
Til the break of dawn  
Baby, I got it goin on  
A lot of pimps won't like this song  
Cuz them punks like to hit it and quit it  
But I'd rather stay and play  
Cuz I'm long and I'm strong  
And I'm down to get the friction on

So ladies (yeah), ladies (yeah)  
If you wanna role in my Mercedes (yeah)  
Then turn around  
Stick it out  
Even white boys got to shout  
Baby got back

(LA face with the Oakland booty)

Yeah baby  
When it comes to females  
Cosmo and got nothin to do with my selection  
36-24-36  
Only if she's 5'3"

So your girlfriend rolls a Honda  
Playin' workout tapes by Fonda  
But Fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her Honda  
My anaconda don't want none unless you've got buns hon  
You can do side bends or sit-ups, but please don't lose that butt  
Some brothers wanna play that hard role  
and tell you that the butt need to go  
So they toss it and leave it  
And I pull up quick to retrieve it  
So Cosmo says you're fat  
Well I ain't down with that  
Cuz your waste is small and your curves are kickin'  
And I'm thinkin' bout stickin'  
To the beanpole dames in the magazines  
You ain't it Miss Thang  
Give me a sista I can't resist her  
Red beans and rice didn't miss her  
Some knucklehead tried to dis  
Cuz his girls were on my list  
He had game but he chose to hit 'em  
And pulled up quick to get with 'em  
So ladies if the butt is round  
And you wanna triple X throw down  
Dial 1-900-mixalot and kick them nasty thoughts  
Baby got back

*the music ends and erik walks in as zoey gets finish dancing with minda*

"damn zoey you dance good and you look sexy too"erik said  
"why thank you erik now that you said that now im horny wanna have sex"zoey replies  
"sure"erik says  
"can i watch"midna askes  
"sure"

While erik and zoey were having sex and minda watching saying things like 'go girl ride him like theres no tomorrow' or'there you go erik show her whos boss' damian and link went to find zoey and midna when they walked in on zoey and erik "ohhh god damn zoey i didnt know you liked it from behind"damian said  
"ok now im blinded i just saw another guys junk"link said

"well to bad i had a suprise for you link"midna purred in his ear  
"i like the sound of that"  
then midna and link start sexing

**well here is the end for chapter one i will need 10 reviews before next chapter**


End file.
